Yes I had convinced myself that I didn't care about him, that a relationship isn't what I wanted but surely something meaningful is always what you have your heart set on. Yes he had never said otherwise that he might be interested in me but he always said that he wasn't ready for a relationship giving me that small grain of hope that when he may decide that he was ready that person would be me.
But he stopped talking to me and I decided to stop making an idiot of myself. So I actually followed my own advice, I blocked him on Facebook chat and deleted his number. When he says that you are friends but doesn't even want to talk to me when he is getting it on with someone else obviously means that we weren't friends.
And then, once again, there it is "Mr Nobody is in a relationship with ..." and it hurts more than I care to tell you. Because this isn't the first time, my ex boyfriend did this to me too and now I hate everything to do with announcing your relationship on Facebook. I know its not about me for either Mr Nobody or my ex but for me it's always about me. Of course they aren't going to sit there and think about whether it will hurt me and of course they aren't going to care.
And then I do the petty thing of comparing my life to a girl on Facebook who I have never met. Of course I can never life up to her, the life you show on Facebook doesn't include the times you sit at home alone or the outfits where you look awful or the time you ate a whole cake to yourself.
So once again, I'm alone and I can say the cliched thing that I'm happy that way but I'm not so what do you say then?
At least I have my friends?